Just in case you haven’t noticed already, you should know I am an awkward person. Very, very awkward. Like, so awkward I have trouble functioning in society. I’ve come to terms with it (mostly) but there are some situations I just don’t understand.

1. Birthdays. Specifically, being sung happy birthday to. Luckily this only happens once a year, but I worry about it nonetheless. Where am I supposed to look as they sing? Do I look at the cake? Do I look at the people singing? Do I pick one person or do I spend equal time looking at each person? Am I supposed to sing along? I DON’T KNOW. Usually I just kind of blush and look at the ground until it’s over. And then cry or something.

2. Hugs. I have a really hard time with hugs. I can’t even explain it, but someone my arms always wind up in the wrong position or I hit my head on something or I don’t even know. It usually starts ok.

I don’t even know.

3. This other situation doesn’t really have a name, but it happens all the time because I wear the same sweatshirt practically every day. It’s grey and it has the name of my boyfriend’s high school on it.

HOSHIT THE TRUTH IS OUT. I DON’T ACTUALLY WEAR A PINK TRIANGLE AND A RED BOW.

Ahem. Anyways. A guy will see my sweatshirt in passing and be like OMG I WENT THERE. Who do you know who went there? And I will say oh my boyfriend went there! And the guy will be like…oh. That’s cool. And then we’d stand there in silence for like 3 years until one of us goes…YEAH COOL GOTTA GO and runs away.

I will end this post just as it started. Awkwardly.